Coordinating care for a loved one, whether it’s an elderly parent or a family suffering from a debilitating disease, isn’t an easy task when it comes to conquering paperwork, making appointments, and making sure your parents are doing what you were told they needed to do. Many people find the process extremely stressful and overwhelming; you’re not alone if you feel that way!
Balancing a full-time job, daily routine, to-do items, and caring for those who depend on you can really push you into a dizzy. Don’t forget to check in with yourself and find the time to ask yourself, how are you doing? When you notice that you desperately are out of breath and at the end of your rope, take a time out, and don’t be afraid to ask for help, advice, guidance, or assistance.
Some things in life are inevitable; such as aging and eventually death. We are all aware that these things happen, so take steps early-on and have conversations with your parents to prepare for these life situations. These people are our loved ones and it’s very unlikely that others will feel the connection you personally have with them. Remembering that you love them, they love you, and asking for help is okay, WILL carry you through when you don’t think you can go on.
Also, don’t fear failure. Especially when you’re caring for your parents; they cared for you relentlessly as best as they knew how, and you might find yourself in the position where that burden is on you to care for them. Worrying about issues that haven’t come up yet is not helpful to either you or the person you’re caring for. A small bit of self-doubt isn’t bad; it keeps you humble and eager to provide better care, but don’t expel so much energy on what-if’s and situations that are completely out of your control.
There is more than one way to successfully care for someone you love. Try different ways of communicating, dealing, processing, and understanding until you find the methods that work for you. You’ll get there if you have trust in yourself and believe you’re able to conquer any learning curve you encounter.
Don’t unnecessarily dwell of the things you’re struggling with and beat yourself up. Replace negative self-thought and bias with a hopeful truth. Maintaining a negative outlook will make the process harder for you and your loved ones. Do your best to lift each other up when things get frustrating.
Keep a limit on the amount of times you think “what-if?” There is no way to prepare for every single what-if that comes up and sometimes these thoughts can end up worsening the disease they are struggling with due to stress.
Accept what is and don’t dwell on what could have… they will fall because their legs are weak, they’ll trip because they forgot about the walker, they will ask you the same question three times because they forget they asked the previous two times, and they will get confused about what medication they are supposed to take. This is all part of aging and the struggle that comes with life. Don’t fret so much about preventing catastrophes and start focusing on being attentive and validating your love for them no matter what ends up happening. Don’t distract yourself from having the opportunity to bond because of mentally exaggerated worries.
Go with the flow and enjoy loving them while they’re in our presence. xoxoTamiBlog